A year ago...

I was re-reading some old journals, and I came across this entry from December 7 of last year (my dad's birthday). I thought you guys would enjoy it in all its unedited glory. And the last part was IN MY JOURNAL, even though I had no idea yet what was about to unfold in the coming months...eerie:

Dear God,

I'm here at the Charleston Airport, waiting for my flight. It's supposed to leave in a half hour and I'm inspired to write.

Tihs weekend was such a blessing. First, it was magical - the women are all inspiring and...oop - boarding....

I'm back. The women. I was talking about the women. They are all at once, inspiring, engaging, intelligent, delightful. We chatted and talked nonstop, as the "token males" looked on. At one point, [someone] expressed concerns that if she laid bare her darker secrets, would the media backlash, the public rejection even, damage the shared vision? I leapt to my feet and imagined that The Howard Stern and Rush Limbaughs of the world were judging and criticizing us from Landon and Leslie's stone hearth. "Yeah? She did that. And she's still here to talk about it. She had the balls to share it with the world in the hopes that it might encourage someone else somewhere. I lived in my car. I was homeless for four months. I'm a f***ing drunk who's been graced with the willingness to be sober. But yeah, I'm a drunk. I go to AA. So what? You got something to say? So say it, you big-nosed bastard. What? What do you have to say? What? BRING IT. WHAT???"

They were pissing themselves, laughing. We had so many moments like that. Like yesterday morning, when I was out at 7 am with Leslie and Mary showing them my Dreambodies plyometric exercises. And as we did our jumping jacks, Leslie's huge black dog ws sniffing my crotch, then I suppose, deciding I was worthy of his affections, leapt up on his hind legs, his big, fat, heavy paws on my shoulders, as if saying "Dance with me!"

It was glorious. Running this morning, as the fog rolled in across th emarsh and the egrets too to the air, I thanked God for blessing me with understanding of my purpose - that it so aligns with my desires and my joy center. Then, as I drove along Route 17, toward the airport, the tears came. Gratitude washed over me and spilled down my cheeks as I said over and over, "Thank God. Thank God."

The day my father died
I swore I heard him say
Beloved, don't you cry for I'm not far away
Just keep your honesty
The truth shall set you free
And follow all your dreams
Of who you long to be
And if you believe in yourself
Then you don't need anything
or anybody else
And if you believe in your dreams
Then your dreams will come true
So believe in yourself
As I believe in you
And now I'm older
Though still his baby girl
And what he told that child
Was a secret of this world
There is magic in believing
It's the pathway to achieving
So wish on that star
Believe in who you are
Because it all begins with you
Cause if you believe in yourself
Then you don't need anything
or anybody else
And if you believe in your dreams
Then your dreams will come true
So believe in yourself
As I believe in you
Yes, believe in yourself
As I believe in you.

I didn't even realize I had written the final pieces of that song right after that weekend. Pretty powerful weekend it was, to bring that song back into my life and into the world. And now look at all it has become. So, thank you guys, for all that you have been in my life. Thank you guys, for all that you continue to be - shining examples of the power of what we can all become ... if we just believe.

Much love to you all, and Happy Holidays.

Last Minute Change

I hosted our SPD Parent Support Group last night. On Friday night, the speaker who was booked called me to cancel due to a family emergency. I was booked all day Saturday and Sunday and didn’t think most people wanted to do business then anyway, so I decided to wait until Monday morning.

I called the local Whole Foods and local Chamberlains and didn’t have any luck there. I even called the corporate office at Chamberlains and didn’t have any luck. I contacted a neighbor who is a nutritionist but she wasn’t available. So I finally decided whatever was supposed to be would be, and that if I found a speaker that came knocking, then I’d book them. So finally, my mom called and told me about Ken Blake, the owner of Curves. I called him and he accepted!

What a treat! Ken was such a delight and so dead on with his message. Although we had a small crowd, he gave the exact message that each of us needed. He was able to hear all of the stories of struggles that each of us have endured with finding the right therapies for our kids and add some advice and lots of empathy and encouragement for all of us.

What an amazing night. It wasn’t what I had expected but it was exactly what was perfect. The right speaker gave the right message for the people who were there, and anyone else wouldn’t have been as perfect as the substitute who came.

So, I’ve learned, when things don’t go your way, when someone cancels on you or changes the plans and you weren’t expecting it, I’ve learned just to go with the flow and know that it’s exactly as it should be.

Perfect!

My Snow Day - by Liimu

Snow is still falling here in PA, and I was one of about a half dozen people who went to the gym, anyway. I mean, really - why not? If I were still binge eating, I would certainly have trekked out to get to the Wawa or Whole Foods to get my stash. Why wouldn't I trek the 10 minutes over to the gym, especially since they were kind enough to have people manning the Kid Care?

I'm so glad I did, too, because it was an awesome workout. I ran 10 minutes at 5.0 mph, then went on to do legs. First, I did Olympic squats, and did 6 reps with 125 pounds (including the weight of the bar). A personal record. Then, on to another personal record - I did a set of 6 reps leg presses at 430 pounds!!! 500 pounds, here we come! Then, my hip was hurting me so my Smith squats were pretty lame (we don't have a hack squat machine at our gym) and then on to burning leg extensions and curls, and then calf raises. No step ups, thank GOD. Then, I decided to take advantage of the 2-hour babysitting and run for a half hour, despite the fact that my legs were burning. So, that was a good workout!

The girls are all home from school and I'm here listening to my two-year old snore, trying to catch up on blog posts and my novel. I haven't written in days. Plus, I have to edit and post the latest radio show for Beyond the Stuff. Thank goodness I'm not working right now! Although I did have a conversation about some potential work coming up in a week or two, so that means JAMAICA IN APRIL!! WOO HOO!

So, that's how I spent my snow day. How about you?

A Week's Worth of Miscellaneous Stuff - by Robin Gorman Newman

I have to say I don't know what to specifically blog about this week....so maybe I'll just share my week wiht you.

I've been multi-tasking big time, a lot with unexpected personal matters.

My son turned 6 this week...and that was exciting. At the same time, some challenges have arisen with him that have occupied much of my thoughts, concern and time. (I prefer not to elaborate at this time...but I know that things will ultimately work themselves out.)

His party is Sunday, and I'm totally psyched for that. He'll love it. We already had one earlier this week for him in the classroom, and it was sweet.

It's that time of the month for me... if you gals out there know what I mean...so I'm not feeling the greatest.

My senior dad went to his cardiologist this week, and was put on two new medications, one of which he isn't overly keen on taking, despite saying on a daily basis that he doesn't feel great.

I'm beginning a new eating/exercise regime. I refuse to say diet, but rather a lifestyle change. It's been two days. I've done "ok" with it thus far. It's been a struggle. I'm truly working on altering my outlook on food. I'd love to view it as sustenance and nourishment versus a "need." I feel I'll get there, and that would be an amazing accomplishment.

Professionally, I'm moving forward with the t-shirts, etc. for MotherhoodLater.com. The designs are still not fully finalized, but I'm hoping in the next 1-2 weeks, I'll be able to post a Shop page on the site.

Yesterday, a friend came over, and our goal was to work together in preparing for teleclasses we'd both like to offer potentially through freeconference.com. While we spent time on that, we wound up ultimately rearranging some furniture in my house. How that happened exactly, I don't know. She is a very aesthetic person, and likes doing this for people, so she brought it up. I just went with the flow of her ideas, and it truly felt like some new positive energy opened up in my home. We switched the direction of the kitchen table, for one, and I'm really liking it. Who knew?! The whole kitchen looks different, and for the better. It's SO great to be open to change. I didn't even know I was looking for change in that way, but it found me.

Today I had a meeting with a Reverend at a local church, and there is a lovely room that would be available for a workshop series I'm planning for the NY chapter of MotherhoodLater.com. So, I'm psyched about that. I've been seeking out a venue for some time now. Today it clicked.

This afternoon I got yelled at by a male parking meter attendant for supposedly extending my car over the walkway in a parking lot. Boy....he's got a lot of anger in him. You'd think I commited a crime. Some people in this world are just not happy and they need to vent at strangers. At first I was angry at him, but then I felt empathy.

Did I tell you I got a call from the supermarket where we ordered Seth's cake? Four days before the party, they tell me they can't get a Power Ranger cake...the one Seth specially picked out. So...what to do...switch to Spiderman? Call another store? (We switched to Spiderman.)

Oh....and our contractor for our upcoming basement project advised us this week that there is a problem with the architectural plans, and things have to be redone. And, our project is now delayed until May...was supposed to start in February.

Today I attended an event called WHO DO YOU KNOW LUNCHEON. It's something I launched a year ago with a friend, and we're still going strong. We meet once/month to share our professional pursuits and inspire, empower and advise each other. It's been helpful and very supportive, kinda like what I feel from the BTS gals. It's so great to be in the company of those who you feel "have your back."

Tomorrow I'm having lunch with a friend from a playwrights group that I also launched in my town. I aspire to write a play one day...it's on my TO DO list....though I haven't attended the group in some time now. I've just had other priorites, but my love of theatre remains.

I'm glad the weekend is coming up. I need to chill a bit, if possible. This was quite the all-consuming week on many levels.

But, you know what? I give it up to the universe. I am happy about those projects that are moving forward, and I'm grateful as some doors open. As for the "bumps" along the way with some items, they'll take care of themselves in time. I trust in that.

The Path To Freedom! By Kelly K. Brown

Me at the Seattle Space Needle on My Own Path to Freedom!


This week started with me living what could have been seen, felt and experienced by me as a ‘painful’ experience. And yet, because I CHOSE to stay ‘present in the very moment’ of the circumstance, I handled the experience in the most effective way possible---by only seeing everyone involved through the eyes of love---a way of living I’ve been practicing as a part of my ‘in the moment’ existence for over a year!

You can imagine how interesting it then was to me, when this exact same topic came up again and again throughout my week.

People, loved ones, friends… many were experiencing feelings, thoughts and the emotion of ‘pain’ about current life events… and in chatting sometimes they experienced it about past events. Past or present, all pain can be avoided by remembering and implementing the practice of one simple action.

Choosing to stay ‘present in the moment’. (Staying ‘present in the moment’ always brings FREEDOM when we choose it!)

Having sufferered the pain of what I call ‘going around the mountain’ again and again over a particular situation or what another person, does, says, did or didn’t do, should have done or I expected them to do---Always, always equals PAIN FOR ME (AND YOU!)

This topic can ‘appear’ complex, so let me explain more carefully.

When we are NOT choosing to live ‘in the moment’, and when things then don’t go OUR way, “You know, the way we think things should go”, or when people don’t behave the way WE think is right or they SHOULD… we experience PAIN!

It is in THAT moment when our thoughts begin to tell us made up stories with the attached history of old experiences, old programming and old emotions… we LOSE our freedom and begin creating personal PAIN. Yes, WE create our own pain---the other person has nothing to do with it whatsoever. (You may want to re-read that last line, as for some this concept could be difficult to understand at first.)

We tell ourselves (and truly want to believe) that all our angst and upset is about another, their actions, or a certain circumstance, but the TRUTH is that it is OUR CHOICE of thoughts in this moment, OUR disappointment about an unmet expectation and our anger that things SHOULDN’T be this way that brings us into immediate pain.

It is an interesting experience to feel how in ONE moment we can change our thoughts AND then instantly and literally FEEL better. We can experience unbelievable freedom when we wisely monitor and choose our thoughts and begin focusing on what we now WANT, instead of what we didn’t like about what just happened or occurred!

When living ‘present in the moment’ I'm able to tell myself NO STORY whatsoever about what is happening.

To put it in plain terms, I DEPERSONALIZE every happening to an understanding of the situation or circumstance as being just a thing ‘that is!’.

No one is wrong
No one is right
No one is at fault… No Story! A happening just occurred---That’s it!

This is TRUTH: Regardless of what the other is thinking, not thinking or how they feel, what their inner perspective is or was, what story they are telling in their mind… it is theirs! It is NOT about us; in fact, we can never really know what another person is thinking anyway (even though we often believe and state that we do).

By living in a state of allowing through conscious awareness, we can surrender to the situation at hand. (Read: I can choose to accept the situation just as it is.)

The gift of awareness is that in the moment we are aware, we can CHOOSE not to tell ourselves a story of inner thoughts from OLD, OUTDATED life experiences. In this moment, what is happening is what is happening NOW and has nothing to do with anything anyone ever said or ever did in the past. (That would be adding in a STORY).

And this is where a common struggle comes in… when we are not living in conscious awareness, when someone doesn’t behave as we think they SHOULD, our thoughts start telling us OLD stories as if they were the ‘present moment TRUTH. Thoughts like:

I can’t believe they did THAT to me! Why didn’t I see this coming?
I should have known better than to trust them, they always…
This is what I get for being such a nice gal/guy.
They did that on purpose just to hurt me---just like everyone else does...
I knew this would happen, this is what ALWAYS happens to me
They make me so angry, they should have... (or shouldn't have...)

Blah, Blah, Blah…

Law of Attraction is extraordinarily fair! It attracts more of what you focus on, so in this example by focusing and thinking ALL those negative thoughts… you get MORE negative thoughts… and you wake up 5 hours later to realize you’ve been obsessing about this for FIVE STRAIGHT HOURS! Wasting your very life with FIVE hours of unproductive, pain-inducing, negative thinking… and worse, these type of thoughts never serve you or the greater good (nothing productive can come from these type of thoughts), they just bring pain in the form of hurt feelings, anger, frustration, irritation and more. (And when not careful… these thoughts can become rather addictive… think like a jilted lover for a sec---one can truly become obsessed in the mire of negative thinking.)

This is where a true understanding of life can create some fun however. If you can stay present in the moment, and CHOOSE NOT to tell any stories in your thoughts, you will find you have chosen to become the OBSERVER of your thoughts.

In that moment, you have just realized the very truth of life that most people never, ever get! YOU are the ‘thinker of your thoughts’, you are NOT your thoughts! That means YOU get to control what you think---you do have a choice! So, you might choose to entertain better feeling thoughts like:

What is IS what is.
This is not exactly what I was expecting.
I have no idea why they behaved this way or why this happened.
I will tell myself no ‘old, habitual, programmed thoughts’ on this topic.
I choose to believe this is about where they are in their life, and not about me.
Maybe they were scared, or worried, or under stress: who knows?
This isn’t about me—people act the way they do for their very OWN reasons.
It could be anything really. I can’t know what they were thinking.
I’ll probably never know so I won’t waste my present moment time:

1) worrying about what the reason was or wasn’t
2) being upset or anguishing through all the negative possibilities, or
3) finding ways to make me right and them wrong so I can feel better in this situation
4) figuring out ways and endless points of view to place blame on them.

Instead, I can choose to:

Live this experience exactly as it is with NO expectation of a different, better or worse outcome, or a ‘how it should have been’ because that time is NOW gone and in the past and it cannot be re-lived, so why would I try to re-live it over and over and over again in the thoughts of my mind? Now is all we’ve got, and we can CHOOSE our thoughts and focus in this NOW moment… and the next, and the next, etc.

We can then start thinking thoughts like:

1) I will choose to love myself and this other person exactly as we are with no judgment toward either of us in this situation. I can choose be the ‘observer’ of my thoughts, and just see what can be learned from this current situation.

2) I will accept that ‘what is IS what is', and then immediately make the choice to now focus ONLY on what I want to have, be, create or experience in my life.

3) I will focus and envision all my future interactions with this other person going exactly the way I’d like with love and joy for all involved.

What you focus on expands and you WILL begin to attract and then experience brand new and much better outcomes as soon as you fill your mind with brand new thoughts, dreams, ideas and feelings of what you now want.

That’s how you do it… Every single time, in every single circumstance, in every life experience!

1) Get and/or stay present in the moment.
2) See what is, and accept that what is IS what is.
3) Note the contrast WITHOUT adding any STORY---no story, no emotion, no personalizing, no old programming thoughts.
4) Begin immediately to ask for and focus on what you NOW want to see in this situation or situations like it.
5) Continue! Focus on those good ideas until you think of something else you want, and then focus on that!

Sounds difficult… and I assure you practice will make it easier and easier and easier--- the more you stay present in the moment and are aware of your thoughts, the easier it gets! And best of all, the REWARD for all your practice is the Path of Freedom: PEACE, JOY, HAPPINESS and EXTRAORDINARY LOVE FOR YOURSELF AND OTHERS.

Choose YOUR Path of Freedom today. Start simply by just becoming aware of your thoughts. Listen to what your thoughts are! As time goes on, become the Observer! Start to notice your positive and negative thoughts and begin to choose only the positive thoughts you now want to think and focus on. From there, it’s nothing more than practice… and we are always practicing something aren’t we?

To YOUR Path of Freedom!

Kelly

Shaking Loose and Finding Your Way by Mary

This is me.. happily promoting.. on the phone.. in my office!


There comes a time in everyone’s life, when they break with tradition and go their own way. Sometimes it surprises people or hurts them because they feel that you’re leaving THEM and the choices they’ve made for their lives.

Blazing your own trail isn’t always easy. Trying to find your way can be a challenge especially when you have a lot of close family and friends always happy to advise you on your path.

I’m a firm believer though that all of us have a truth that is completely unique to us, just as unique as our fingerprints, and it might not always be right for everyone, or in fact for ANYONE else, but for us, it’s the way it’s supposed to be.

So, I’ve been doing a bit of this in my life, and some of it is a bit rough around the edges, but slowly, people are understanding that I’m not ruffling feathers to get attention or to just create a scene, but that I’m genuinely on a path and can’t be persuaded by them to alter my course. I’m dead set on being true to my own path, whether they understand or agree with it or not.

And what’s happening is the most unbelievable. When you get very clear about where you’re headed, and get rid of the Shoulda, woulda, couldas, then the challenges disappear and the path appears.

I’m finding that the path is still a bit winding, but there is no mistake, it’s putting one foot in front of another, like rocks that appear in a creek to get across.. I take a step into the unknown, and the next step mysteriously appears.

Once I got clear on being a PROMOTER, and a damn good one at that(!) then all sorts of creative ideas started flooding my head, and I got ultra productive and people and opportunities found me. I didn’t have to look very far. I basically showed up and the opportunities found me! I’m getting help from all directions and I feel like God’s taking me on a path and I’m just along for the ride. It’s so funny, because I’m back to doing the same sorts of things I did years ago, but now, I’m so much more balanced and have experience in so many other areas as well.

I have no idea how this ride will end up, but it’s left the business of “speakers”and has found it’s way into performers.. and into the TV world,.. and into entertainment! This is where I wanted to be all along, but didn’t know how to get there. There is also the dream of getting back to hosting a show, but now I see how I’m a woman of many talents and abilities and have tremendous energy and am able to accomplish a heck of a lot when I am focused and clear about my direction. I’ve become very selective of who I spend time with, protective about my time, and am using every waking hour to be productive. I’ve accomplished more in the past two weeks than I have in the past few years when I was trying to go straight for my dream of hosting a show with celebrity causes. Now that I am back to being “a promoter” which is what I am naturally, and instinctively, I’m unstoppable!!! . I’ve even lost 10 lbs that has just naturally fallen off because I’m taking such great care of myself- mentally, physically, emotionally and spiritually. As a result of that, I’m dressing up more, and getting more attention, and you know what? I’m eating it up! I’m just enjoying people who are enjoying me..and mirroring back to them the gratitude they’re showing me. I used to shrink away from attention for being attractive but now I embrace it and have fun with it! This new sense of myself has even made me more bold, creative, centered and structured with my coaching, and as a result, my clients are more empowered and moving forward more quickly!

When I look back over the course of my curvy path I took to get here, I wouldn’t change a thing. I wouldn’t change the struggles and the difficulties I endured trying to “find” myself. I tried and failed so many times, but I never gave up, and ultimately, I got pretty good at some of the stuff I failed at numerous times. Now, I can step up to a microphone and wing it, step in front of a camera and speak extemporaneously, write a speech within minutes, write a column or article or conduct a celebrity interview with ease, clean a house without stopping, cook a meal that impresses without burning it, sit down and do homework without fretting or screaming, do laundry without dreading it, have a meeting with a bunch of teachers over sensitive topics without stressing, sit down with the accountant without falling asleep, and I can have some ice cream or some sweet and not have to eat the whole thing.

I guess I finally got “Beyond my Stuff”; the stuff that held me back for so long. The stuff I knew about myself, or the stuff I didn’t know, and even the relationships that got in the way of me being effective. I finally found my personal power, and the acceptance for myself and have finally gotten to the point where I actually respect myself for the hard work I’ve put in and for the things I’ve learned and accomplished. I’ve learned how to say no. I’ve learned to disagree. I’ve learned I don’t need anyone’s else approval, I’ve stopped the constant socializing, and I’ve learned to limit my exposure to people and ideas that don’t influence me in the way I want to be influenced. And I’ve learned I’m powerful. I’m not just a “big personality with big dreams”.. I’m a solid person, with solid work experience, with great contacts, with excellent ideas, and with an amazing work ethic!

Now, I know I’m worth my success and now I gotta go get it. No one is going to hand it to me, I have to step up, set goals and go get it! And now, I will get to where I want to go, because I finally “GOT”, that it’s not the destination that matters, and I had to take that long and winding road to learn all of the things that I needed to know to get me to where I’ll ultimately go. This is what matters. It’s the time that an individual needs to grow and mature and blossom. It’s hard work, but when you arrive, you look and feel great!

Thanks to my “gals” at BTS, who have been an incredibly important piece of my puzzle.. of helping me see myself for who I am, for accepting me even when I wasn’t so in sync with myself or with others, and for telling me that I was on the right path and kept cheering me to push through to find my way.

So now that I’m here, I won’t stop, because this new place feels so good. It feels right and now I can sit in my office with complete acceptance, finish my projects and generate more, because I’m not “shrinking” any more. Here is my favorite quote that I have always loved, and am finally living!

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us.We ask ourselves, "Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?"Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God.Your playing small doesn't serve the world.There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so thatother people won't feel insecure around you.We are all meant to shine, as children do.We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us.It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone.And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously giveother people permission to do the same.As we're liberated from our own fear,our presence automatically liberates others.~by Marianne WilliamsonA Return to Love: Reflections On The Principles of A Course In Miracles,p. 165, HarperCollins, 1992

When Bad Stuff Happens...Make it GOOD - by Liimu

I want to share with you guys something really wonderful that happened this week. So, I mentioned a few days ago how devastated I was by the fact that this writing workshop I had been looking forward to for months was cancelled. The poor author who was planning to facilitate had some serious health stuff she has to tend to this weekend. Not only can I not fault her for having to postpone/cancel the workshop, I'm seriously worried for her and saying all the prayers I can say.

That being said, I was absolutely devastated. Did I mention I was devastated? In my mind, I had built this workshop up to be the ultimate turning point, the breakout moment for me as an author. The facilitator would help me with my writing, I would get her all excited about working out and fitness and she and I would be come BFFs and skip off into the sunset together into Bestselling Authorland.

So, when the workshop was cancelled, on some level, at least for a moment, I felt like that dream of mine had been cancelled. For just a moment, I felt like I was being relegated back to the way, way back seat of my father's station wagon, when I had been promised that I'd get to sit in the front! Wahhh...(have any of you heard any of these Fred videos on YouTube? Sorry, I digress.)

Anyhoo, after a little bit of boo hoo-ing, and some warm loving hugs from my very sympathetic husband and children, I ... how shall I put it? GOT OVER IT. And the next morning, I woke up with a fire in my belly about writing, and a keen awareness that the only thing standing in the way of my happy skip off into the sunsets of Bestselling Authorland was my own two hands. If I'd put them to good use, a skipping I would go. I sat down on my couch and got to work on the outline for the novel. And I finished it! And then, later that day, I wrote 2500 words toward the first draft, and made an accountability agreement with a dear friend to write 2000 words every day (except on the weekends, when I will write 500 words a day).

Something has changed. I have read about other authors saying how the characters come to life and the novel pulls at you, begging, even insisting that you write it. It nearly writes itself. This is how it feels! I never thought I would feel that way, but I also never felt like I would be able to relate to runners who say that after a certain point, they feel like they could run forever. HAH! I've felt that, too!

Can I say it? I AM A WRITER! Now on to finishing this draft and getting it into the hands of a publisher, so I can finally realize my destiny of becoming a BESTSELLING AUTHOR!

Mommy Meltdown -- by Robin Gorman Newman

I had a total mom meltdown yesterday.

I feel like I'm 48 going on 8.

My son, Seth, had a playdate here. It was supposed to be at a friend's house, but plans got changed last minute, and they wound up at our house. It was the second playdate with this particular friend, and I wanted to be a good host. This was a drop-off, and the mom was going to hang with me a bit when she came to pick her up after two hours.

I have to confess. Playdates here are often not fun for me. On one level, I love seeing kids playing happily and creatively. On another level, when it becomes a "playdate gone wild," I ultimately crack. Not during the playdate, but afterwards, when I have to do battle with my son to do clean-up. That's when "mommy maid" emerges and I get completely fed up. And, yesterday, I really lost it.

We are planning to gut our basement in the few months and redo the whole thing, complete with a play room area, etc. But, until then, our living room (we don't have a den), has taken on a life of its own with Seth's many toys piled up in nooks 'n crannies. I wouldn't mind so much, except that many have teeny tiny pieces which are in a huge disaray, so they basically look like a pile of junk, and Seth treats them that way.

On top of it, in the last week, he's lost three things. A toy spy kit. Belt. And stuffed musical dog we gave him for Valentine's Day. Amazingly we did find them all....but I'm tired of playing scavenger hunt for his things.

I've broached the subject of "patience" with members of motherhoodlater.com at get togethers we've had. I truly feel I have less patience as a 40 something mom. I told my husband when he came home from work yesterday that I "need to get out of here!!" And, I meant it...but it's easier said than done. I could have jumped on a plane that moment....quickly packed a bag.....and flown off to...I don't know where...but someplace where I could just be Robin and put aside my mommy role temporarily.

Maybe I'm having a mid life crisis? Is this what they're like? I know I'm perimenopausal. With hormones in fluctuation, that's bound to affect one's moods. I get that. So, is that what this is? Or maybe it was just a particularly challenging playdate and I'll get over it? I am entitled to have these moments.I was speaking with a close friend on the phone today who said that she's been in a funk of late...and it's not like her to say that. She's one of the most upbeat people I know.Could it be Mercury Retrograde perhaps? Some kind of misalignment with the stars? Hmmmm....something in the air?

Today I felt somewhat better. In my fit of fury last night, Seth and I dumped some of this toys...three garbage bags full...and that was therapeutic for me....and good for him as well. Toy clutter leads to a total lack of appreciation, and he can't focus or even decide what to play with.

This afternoon, we went to a playspace with two other mom friends and their sons. I didn't love it....the music was blaring.....it was pricey for what it was.....and the seating wasn't comfortable or so readily available. But, Seth had fun. In the end, that's what counts.

It does get to be hard sometimes as a mom compromising your own comfort, etc. for the sake of your child. I fully realize that this is what moms do...but it doesn't mean it's easy. We just rise to the occasion.

Monday, Seth will be back in school (he was off this whole week), and I'll be in his classroom. I was invited to make an appearance as an author and to share my experiences writing books. I'm looking forwad to that. It reminds me of how at a very young age, I aspired to be a writer, and would actually create my own kids books, complete with illustrations. I plan to bring in some as a show 'n tell. And, then I'm hosting a little party in his classroom since his 6th birthday is Tuesday.

Time flies. Six already. Wow! And, as my friend reminded me today after I shared my exasperating playdate experience, he won't be little forever. And, the day will come before I blink my eyes, where he's just going out with his friends, with no mommy-in-tow.....and I might then miss these mommy 'n me outings.

Time will tell.

A NEW and Timely Perspective About Money! by Kelly K. Brown

Yes, I do believe Money CAN and DOES Grow On Trees!

I spent quite a bit of time pondering about money the other day. A dear friend from a mastermind group gave me a cd about money and in listening to it, many thoughts about money started going though my mind.

One of the FIRST things I thought about was a memory of how much I absolutely, and without reservation LOVED money as a child. I remember holding it (coins back then) and liking how it sounded when I’d take them out of my jar and ‘clink, clink, clink’ drop them back in! I loved to count it, I loved to have it, and I loved to see it… I clearly remember having a wonderful relationship with money---it felt good to me---I felt good having it!

And then I remembered something else… I remembered how my family started making fun of me for loving money! They would make side (snide?) comments about me liking my money so much, and then came all those ill-informed ideas that money is the root of all evil conversations (yes they misquoted that phrase)… money isn’t everything, money doesn’t grow on trees---and I clearly remember FEELING bad because I loved my money! I remember thinking I had to PRETEND I didn’t love money, that to be accepted in my family, I had to HIDE that I loved my money! In essence they made fun of me for loving money!

Hmmmmmm… Can you relate to this on any level? How did you as a child instinctively FEEL about money? How do you REALLY FEEL now about money today? What did your family say about money? Do you ever take the time to LOOK at your money or do you just spend it without even thinking about it at all?

Extremely well versed in the Law of Attraction, I clearly know how very important our FEELINGS are, as well as our words and thoughts about what we are creating and thereby attracting into our world---into our reality.

So, in light of these memories I forgot LONG AGO, I took the time and made the effort to go back to other 'money is bad' memories and start ‘cleaning up’ that ‘old programming’ from my past that no longer serves me and decided to create some NEW memories and thoughts about money that WILL serve me in attracting the vast abundance I intend to have!

I want to share with you that in doing this Money Exercise, I had the absolute BEST TIME EVER! What started as a clearing of old feelings, thoughts and patterns of belief about money became an opportunity for me to again think about and express my unending LOVE to the universe where I’m so very fortunate to live.

As I started looking at the money (starting with a few suggestions from the cd), I started thinking A LOT about money---but NOT in the way you might imagine!

I started thinking about how money blesses every hand that touches it!

It’s true! As I looked at my $1 bill, I started to imagine all the people’s lives this money had touched… what they may have spent it on, what they received in exchange for sending it back out into circulation, and the joy they may have felt in the spending of it---which ended with how joyous I was to now be in possession of this ONE WONDROUS DOLLAR that may have touched and blessed millions of people and possibly gone all over the world and back to rest with me!

I started to remember that money ALWAYS gives a gift to me (and YOU) when we spend it because we always get something wonderful when we exchange it for something else. And it doesn’t matter what we spend it on… we always get something wonderful in return!

In my life of rental properties, handymen, rents received, mortgages paid, groceries purchased and trash taken to the street, purchasing everything from gas to gum and paying taxes, I completely FORGOT about the incredible wonder of money when viewed in that context!

I can already hear some of the naysayers who are thinking about when they pay for a car repair, property taxes, a fine or a fee that they are not receiving a wonderful blessing in exchange for their money, but I beg to differ.

Do you realize (remember) even when you pay taxes, fees or fines what it is you ARE ‘getting’? You are getting firemen, policemen, a military, a government that provides many benefits and safety for not only us, but many benefits for our entire world?

Do you remember that every time you spend money you are blessing this business owner and that business owner who in turn feeds their family and spends their money on the goods and services of another business or person that is now blessed by the never ending FLOW OF MONEY? And it NEVER ends! The blessings never, ever end until we forget that this is the ultimate purpose of money…to bless ourselves AND others!

In China I saw many examples of people blessing their money through various forms of worship!

Can you see how it is also just as wonderful to SAVE your money; to put some away for a special occasion, a new car, a vacation, or for a rainy day? It’s YOUR money and there is no right or wrong in it! You can love your money any way you want and it is perfectly okay----unless you subscribe to other people’s outdated and completely misinformed ideas, rules and regulations about money!

This is the point where my journey took an incredible turn again toward LOVE!

As I was having all these wonderful old memories about my money, and was ‘in the moment’ creating wonderful, joyous new feelings about all the blessings I receive when I put my money into the flow of the universe, I had a brand new incredible thought!

Out-of-the blue, and directly from my inner guidance, I had a new thought about how I could now (in my newly acquired state of love for money) CHOOSE to bless every single dollar as it leaves me to be a ‘double blessing’ for the next person who receives it.

My heart was thumping and my pulse was racing as I visualized what an incredible gift it will be to mail out all my bills, my mortgages, my service bills and literally send a blessing that the very person who next receives those monies is blessed (by my money now in THEIR hands) going TWICE as far as it did for me!

Maybe they will by chance find a special ½ price sale the day they go to spend this blessed money, or maybe they will receive a discount or a coupon that makes their money go twice as far as it would normally go. Maybe the money will just be multiplied in their care!

You see, everything in life is LITERALLY about perspective and it is the same with money!

WHAT IS YOUR PERSPECTIVE about having money, giving money, receiving money, spending money, etc.? Your perspective about everything is controlled completely BY YOU and you can change your perspective at any time you CHOOSE to create and believe new thoughts. What anyone (or everyone) else says, said, believes or thinks makes absolutely no difference---YOU get to decide what YOU think about money for YOU!

And what you think about money makes ALL THE DIFFERENCE when you are wanting to attract more of it into YOUR life experience!

Today I challenge you to take a little time and really THINK about money… look at it, touch it, hold it! What are your thoughts about it? What would you LIKE to think about it? Do you love it? Would you like to love it? Do you think it is good or evil? Do you think you will never have enough of it or that you are abundantly blessed? Examine your thoughts, beliefs and perspectives and then purposely CHOOSE new and BETTER ideas that resonate with YOU for your best well-being.

Then, when you really ‘feel’ the wondrous joy that YOUR money truly is (regardless of how much you do or don’t have), join me in blessing all the money you have and all the money you spend to be a double blessing to those who will receive it from you—no matter who they are or where they live. Take a moment or two and actually IMAGINE the love and joy you’ve spread as each person (even in this economic time) enjoys a new abundance from your newly beloved, and now blessed money!

With extraordinary love for YOU and your MONEY!

Kelly

Going Back to Stuff… by Mary

I finally admitted it a few weeks ago. I knew it all along. I tried to stuff it down deep and bury it and learn all sorts of other things. I took classes, certifications, studied, taught, coached, owned businesses and ran as far as possible from it… but it’s back… because I finally realized.. after 15 solid years of trying NOT to do it.. but doing it all along.. the simple truth is.. is that I’m … I’m … I’m a promoter.

Yep! I’m a sales person!

OK! Before you run the other way … I’ll explain!!! It’s actually a good thing to be a natural promoter. And I’m learning how GREAT it is to have a skill like this! Because as it turns out now.. I’m able to help a TON of people!

My first job out of college was an administrative job which I was not suited for and horrible at. I was a secretary on Capital Hill. All I wanted to do was to hang out and meet the celebrities who would eye me across the room during big Judiciary meetings but would ultimately be chased down by the politicians who were more important than some cute 20 something young girl who just loved the excitement of it all. I was the one who would type up letters and my eyes would miss 2 or 3 sentences and the letters wouldn’t end up making any sense. The Attorney on Staff, Beverly, was very gracious and never made me feel bad, but I just never felt like I quite cut it and I ultimately quit a few weeks before the Senator I worked for retired.

Then, I landed the job that would ultimately change the direction of my life..booking celebrity speakers through Keppler Speakers in DC. I loved that job, loved the people I worked with and did it well for 7 years. I came up from nothing and ended up making a name for myself, jamming on the phones every day to colleges all over the US.

My goal was simple. Find out WHO the person was, and coach them to find it.. to do it or to achieve it! And oh, yah, by the way.. book some speakers with them.. which I always did. I truly loved the people I met and am STILL friends with some of them to this very day. One guy I spoke with was the brother of one of my clients. He’s now a big wig with the Major Baseball Leagues in London. Clive Russell is still a good buddy.. and that’s from about 16-17 years ago!

I finally decided to get out of sales when I moved to NC and started a PR business. Little did I realize, that EVERYTHING is sales, and everything NEEDS to be sold. From the napkins you eat with to the clothes you wear, someone is using their talent to show it, demonstrate it and present it to the right people. It’s all about the connections.

So, I’ve gone BACK to my roots, of selling, and I feel so blessed that I can go BACK to such a fun career as booking entertainment. Oh, I”ll still coach and speak and do marketing consulting, but I’ll be promoting and selling and helping whoever I can during this time where everyone seems to need an extra push to get out there and let their services be known!

I’m finding now that it’s like getting back in some old jeans that fit just right, or an old shoe that your feet just slides in comfortably. I’m able to see the GOOD and the HIP parts of whoever I meet and can shine the light on them in a fun way so everyone enjoys it. If it’s not a fit for someone else.. no problem.. “have a great day and we’ll catch up again later”. But if it is, then I’ll make sure they’re incredibly happy with their choice!


Going back… it’s not so bad. I’ve had some great experiences in between.. on TV, with PR, with branding, coaching, training, management and with entrepreneurship. But I’ve never quite felt like it fit like a glove. I had to work at it a little, and had to gear up and practice and learn. Not with sales. Not with promotion. It came as natural as any instinct can.

So, I’m back. I’m not boxing myself into just speakers or performers. My skills are here to help whoever needs it and who I can really serve … so I can make us both money.

Going back to stuff from the past. Not always a bad thing… and sometimes its just the EXACT right thing.. that you need .. to move ahead!

Serendipitous Stuff - by Liimu

I'm not a regular horoscope checker, but I couldn't help but smile when I stumbled across today's horoscope:

Today could pan out well for you, or it could pan out not so well for you. The outcome depends on the way you chose to react to the day's news. The best way to ensure that things go brightly is to stay positive. Visualize the way you want things to go down and do whatever you can to make them manifest that way. Show the universe how you want things to be, and it might just follow along. Avoid negative people who like to focus on things that are wrong, and you're likely to stay more cheerful yourself.

It's so interesting how messages come from the Universe in so many different ways. This is a message that came through my Yahoo Horoscope, which I haven't checked in MONTHS, maybe years.

My attitude has needed a serious adjustment. I have been walking around cranky all day because I am on a liquid diet (today), found out that one of my prospective clients is postponing our new project by at least a month, and had to meet with my accountant to find out my tax liability for 2008.

Here are the facts, when filtered through a positive attitude:

1. I am having a great time being off work, working out, eating healthy, getting ready to go to a writing workshop with one of my favorite authors for four days, and looking better than I have in years, I might add (see side picture).


2. I have been working on an intense proposal that, if it's successful, would result in a new partnership with a new client. The delay in my other project will create the space in my life to finish this project. Otherwise, I wouldn't have time.


3. My tax liability is less than it could have been and after it's paid, I still have enough to get me through another four months.

I know it's all in my attitude. I asked for this time off from the Universe. I begged to be given the space to attend to other areas of my life - my writing, my health, my life coaching practice. Now, all I have to do is stop spending so much time complaining and spend more time manifesting and enjoying the wonderful, glorious space I have been blessed with in which I can (and fully intend) to create beautiful things!!!

Self Stuff: Past & Present -- By Robin Gorman Newman

(that's me on the far right)

Who have I become? And, who do I yearn to be today and tomorrow?

I had a "telling" experience this week.

I got into a conversation with my trainer at the gym re: looks...and somehow it came up how I used to look. My body.... etc. Partly since I aspire to lose weight. I have steadily gained since marriage (I admit it), and I'm not happy about it. My mom, may she rest in peace, was overweight much of her married life, and I fight against following that same path. I feel like it's not too late to change that. Does it have to be my destiny too?

I brought an old photo album into the gym, and my trainer went wild. She said I had a smokin' bod and proceeded to show the photos to a couple of the men training at the gym. I then flipped over one of the photos that they in particular were lusting after, to see the date on the back and discover that I was 14 in that shot.

I was wearing a cool halter top, with tight, short black shorts, and standing in such a way that I had confidence about my looks. Did I? I wondered. Or did it just look that way from my stance?

To be honest...and most people who know me well...will know that I've never felt truly confident in the looks department. Is it possible that I did when I was 14 and things changed? Or did it just appear that way in the photo but wasn't really true?

What does it take to think you look pretty? How come I stuggle to perceive myself that way? I'd like to see myself through someone else's eyes, in a positive sense.

When someone says that to me, I don't fully grasp or believe it.

How do celebrities walk the red carpet and flaunt it with flair? I can't for a second imagine that...but it sure would be fun!

How can I achieve that?

Is it possible to bottle physical self confidence? I know it's an inner job. But, for me, easier said than done.

On other levels, I do feel confident....mostly professionally.

On a personal level, I think I've often doubted myself.

For example -- My ability to take on responsibility. (I do it...but fight it.)

My ability to practice self care. (I know how to meditate, but don't often do it. I do hit the gym, but not often enough. I do take supplements, but sometimes get tired of the regine.)

I know I'm hard on myself. I have that level of awareness, but I also have high expectations. The on-going achiever. How do I do so much? people ask.

But, at the end of the day, isn't it about happiness? How did you spend your time? Was there pleasure in your day?

I went to a meditation session and talk last night in my town. The subject was healing. The speaker has us form small groups and write our answers to various questions. The final question had to do with...what would it take for us to feel the way we'd like? What one thing could we do the next morning to bring that into our lives?

It left me thinking about the choices we make and how we do spend our time on a daily basis.

What did I think life would be when I was 14? What were my aspirations? What made me happy? What made me sad?

I wish I could for a moment, revisit that time in my life, and gain some insight. I'd be really curious to know what 14 year old Robin was thinking.

Dancing In The Rain, By Kelly K. Brown

A rainy day at the 3 Rivers Gorge Dam in China



"Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass... it's about learning to dance in the rain!" ---Nancy Salmon

This is such an incredible quote and a true understanding of its message could make all the difference in the world---LITERALLY to the entire world!

I know that sounds strange, so go with me here for a moment...

The one thing we know for certain about life is that it happens! The good and the bad (which I prefer to think of only as ‘contrast’)—and regardless… it happens.

Death, birth, illness, well-being, shortage of money, extravagant surplus of money, starvation and obesity, economic fluctuations in any direction, those who live to serve, and those who live seemingly to take advantage---all exist in this world we call our ‘home’.

So why are we surprised when anything happens, good or bad?

We know (yes, we know!) from pretty much the moment we have an awareness of life at all, that each and every one of us will one day physically die. I mean, have you ever met anyone who didn’t… at some point… die? Or get ill or recover, or celebrate through an up time or suffer in a down time? Bemoan it if you wish, but this is the truth of LIFE! Stuff happens!

So again I ask you, why the surprise when some unfortunate incident occurs? Or why the surprise when some incredible good fortune comes your way?

For me, my initiation into awareness of this major life lesson came at a very early age… when I was a mere 5 years old. Through an incredible circumstance, both of my legs were cut off by a lawnmower even though I was physically nowhere near it.

My Dad was mowing the lawn at our home in Illinois with a push mower when the one bolt mechanism that held the blade in place broke off and the entire blade flew out from under the mower, through our rather large yard and hit me across the shin area of both legs and flew beyond me into a field.

Stop for a second and imagine that! Imagine being my Dad who was mowing the lawn! Imagine being my sisters who were standing less than 2 feet away! Imagine being ME! That blade could have gone in any direction, hit anyone, anything or nothing all. But the truth of what happened is this: the blade HIT ME---and in less than an instant, my legs were gone.

I can remember for years after the accident, people asking me how I felt about it and did I ever wonder why it happened to me… and the truth is I never really gave it a thought. In fact, after they’d ask the question, I would more often wonder, “Why NOT me? Why NOT you? Should it have been someone else?”

The point I’m making is that through the ‘circumstance’ of an accident I was given a special insight most people do not learn until they are much older (if indeed they ever learn it at all).

Every time I went to a hospital, a clinic or to physical therapy, I’d see other people like myself or others in much worse condition---and ‘WHY ME?’ became a concept without valid meaning. I would often wonder “WHY ANY of these wonderful children, adults or people?”

My positive mindset and compassion for others (instead of a ‘poor me’ mentality) allowed me to easily overcome my physical condition ‘mentally’ by achieving a very good (and very valid) perspective about life!

At an incredibly young age, I understood something very important about life, I understood that:

Life wasn’t ‘for’ or ‘against’ me based on some random accident (or other life circumstance). My Life is WHAT I CREATE it to be through my own interpretation and perspectives about EVERYTHING! My inner joy came about through my understanding of what that MEANT about life in general.

That is what the quote above is all about. Storms will come and go, but it’s the learning how to dance in the rain that makes ALL THE DIFFERENCE! HOW you focus YOUR thoughts and feelings through the storm WHILE YOU ARE IN IT, determines WHAT and HOW the next circumstance of your life will be. (Keeping in mind how the Law of Attraction works, but of course!)

Think for a moment about Nelson Mandela! I can vividly remember what I was thinking the first time I heard about his positive mindset after all those years of imprisonment. Internally, I was screaming, “There is no way I’d come out of prison speaking love, forgiveness and healing… NO WAY!” And yet, that is exactly what he CHOSE to do and his very thoughts changed the course of HIS LIFE and an entire country’s history in the making!

These are extreme examples and most people will not have to be imprisoned or have their legs amputated to prove the point I’m making. Most people (when reminded) know that they have the power to ‘create their life’ in any situation—it is completely up to them based on the thoughts they choose to think!

Every single day we CHOOSE our thoughts and our focus. From the moment we wake up, we have the FREE WILL to CHOOSE any perspective about the circumstances of life we are living. Choosing the best perspective possible, makes us feel better and allows us to move forward in life with complete and utter joy… It is completely up to us! Remember:

There is no circumstance in life that a better perspective cannot turn the tide and begin attracting something far better than you ever imagined!

So, did having a good perspective bring my legs back? Did focusing on forgiveness and love get back all the years Mandela lost in prison? Not at all! BUT understanding... accepting and allowing that ‘what is’ IS ‘what is’, and then choosing the best thoughts and perspectives about all you DO have and all you CAN DO, creates all the difference in the world not only for you in the moment you do it, but for every single life you are fortunate enough to touch.

Thoughts do become things indeed, and finding ways to choose a ‘better’ perspective about any situation you are currently in will only create better future circumstances in your life.

Today, I challenge you to listen to your thoughts! What are your thoughts telling you about your future? Are they saying, “Poor me, why does this always happen to me?” which only brings more of the same. Or are they saying, “Wow, this was unexpected; how can I now think about this experience in a way that will help me feel better?” Or, How can I use this experience to help someone else, uplift another or encourage someone in need?”

In the meantime, should a storm of life catch you by surprise, you can choose to face it by opening with a brand new thought...

“Let the Dance Begin!”

Always dancing in mind, body and spirit…

Kelly

To alleviate any confusion, please note: through a series of surgeries my legs were re-attached at the time of the original accident, however, gangrene very quickly set into my right leg and it was later re-amputated. I am wonderfully blessed to be incredibly athletic (strangers are always completely surprised when they discover that one of my legs is artificial). I roller skate, water ski, snow ski, have worked out since I was 19 years old and in fact, taught high impact aerobics for 8 years. I took up weight training 5 years ago and currently DANCE anywhere from 2 to 4 nights a week.

Plugging into only Positive Stuff.. Still! by Mary

Oh my gosh.. I just wrote a whole blog and then my BATTERY Died! Yep.. right before I was SAVING it! So… now it’s 10 34, and way past my bed time so in a nut shell.. here it is!!!

Great call today with the BTS gals. On weight and health.. check us out.. you’ll totally learn and get pumped!!!

I’m keeping things positive and cool things are happening. People are asking me who I’m reading (http://www.beyondthestuff.com/!!!) and what they can do to stay the same way. Very cool.

Another gal who is in the hospital shared that my message was the ONLY positive thing she’d heard all week long.. and she thanked me.. that was really a great experience for sure!

I’m twittering lots of positive stuff, and taking OFF anyone who is reporting on the news. I don’t want to know about companies closings and lay offs. I’d rather talk about NEW opportunities for those people and how their lives are about to change.. ultimately for good!

Many “services” have been offered to me to help me with my upcoming book on our journey with SPD, ADHD and Atypical Autism. So when I mentioned last week I’m praying for financial abundance, I’m getting it, although not in cash at this point, but definitely lots of value!

Kelly reengineered my “talk” from “I need to pay bills” to “my bills will be paid on time and will get paid!” It’s much more empowering to claim with all certainty that the bills WILL get paid!! “My bills WILL get paid. My bills WILL get paid. My bills WILL Get paid”. I don’t have to know how or when or where, but they WILL get paid! Kelly is certain of it!

I’m starting a 30 day test of faith for a healing from ADHD in our home. My son is still having challenges so for the next 30 days, we’re reading healing scriptures and applying the same talk to Jeremy that is about him being a FOCUSED, OBEDIENT, compliant and an outstanding student with great behavior. We’ll start those affirmations in the morning and I will be recording the outcome.

So that’s what’s going on in a nutshell. I’ve been getting to bed earlier and waking up earlier which has been nice. I’m still plugging away at the gym and am still doing pretty well there. I’m grateful for the peace that I feel and have had in my home and am grateful that I’m so abundantly blessed with friends!!!

I will report next week on the updates of what I hope will be miracles that have taken place!!! Please send me your positive energy, and your prayers.. and I’ll send you mine!

When to Sweat the Small Stuff - By LIimu

So, when should you sweat the small stuff? When the small stuff is keeping you from your goal. In my case, it's a bite of this, a nibble of that. Small missteps that have led to big delays in my achievement of my dreams.

Another sloppy weekend. I have a confession (which I have made privately in life, but I am willing to make here), which is that I am a compulsive overeater. You already know that I have been in recovery from other addictions for nearly 14 years (my anniversary is March 7). I know that I need to develop the same willingness and the same humility around this aspect of my addictedness.

Morning meditations are such a wonderful thing in my life, because they almost always hit exactly whatever it is I am going through. So it was no surprise that one of my meditations was all about how we play with our recovery. It suggested an interesting exercise, which I will share with you. What it suggested was that we list ways we work our Program, and ways we play with it, and then focus on the first list throughout the day. (This can also work with any other fitness or diet program you might follow, by the way.)

Here's my list of how I work the program:

Call my sponsor
Make a plan
Write down my plan
Follow my plan
Go to a meeting
Practice mindful meditation
Eat consciously
Pray before eating
Work the steps
Avoid people, places and things
Don't take the first compulsive bite NO MATTER WHAT

I printed that out and put it on my fridge, in my purse, in my car and on my wall.

In case you're morbidly curious, here's my list of the ways I was playing with my program:

Telling myself, "I'll remember it,,," or "One nibble won't hurt..."
Forgetting what I eat
Going to a party without being prepared
Futurizing (my word for idealizing about the future)
Thinking negatively
Missing meetings
Neglecting to call or email my sponsor
Skipping steps

This post is all about casting positive thoughts into the Universe about how I intend to recreate myself as an elite athlete. One of my meditations talked about nothing more than how close I am to realizing my goals. Very, very, very close, it said. My online personal trainer has a vision of me being on magazine covers. I LOVE that. I need to become it. I am very close. I will weigh 140 by the end of this year. I will be ripped and toned. I will not let my demons take this dream from me anymore than I would have let them take my family and children - and they would have if I had kept drinking.

These dreams are mine and I fully intend to claim them.

Sleep Stuff - By Robin Gorman Newman

I am weary this week.

It's snowy in New York, and I'm tired from it....among other things.

Seth, my son, was off on Tuesday from school for administrative reasons, and we ran around and did errands, he went to the eye doctor (which was a whole drama for him) and we had a playdate with a little girl in his kindergarten class. They're cute together. A budding romance with five year olds....very sweet.

The next day, I spent the afternoon with a friend who is launching a cool business and needs guidance on the PR front. I am media training her so she will be comfortable doing press interviews, especially television. It feels like a trip down memory lane, taking me back to my days as a VP with a NYC Public Relations firm. Was that another life? No....me.....only younger....and pre-motherhood. I kinda miss those days sometimes, as much as I love my son. Parenting does wear me out some days.

Today I was on the Forum for my site http://www.motherhoodlater.com/ and got upset because there was some spam on it. I realized that it needs to be better controlled, and that hadn't occurred to me. Who would bother to visit a moms site and post gibberish and other appropriate content?!

I just feel like I've been jumping from project to project this week.

And, I'm not sleeping well. I hate that. And, I'm not a napper, so I don't make up for it. It's like I have an automatic alarm in me and I get up around 4AM almost nightly. I stumble into the bathroom, where I often check my Blackberry (yes....I'm an email addict), and then make an attempt to go back to sleep. Then, before I know it, the alarm goes off and I rush to get Seth off to school. Next I debate about going back to sleep, which I never do. I figure I'll wake up eventually even if I spend much of the day being a bit out of sorts and irritable from insufficient sleep.

What is this waking up about? Maybe my mind isn't quiet enough? Maybe it's hormones? Maybe a combination?

Tonight Marc (my husband) is out at a work function. I put Seth to sleep. He was wiped too. (Sometimes I find his sentiments echo mine.. interesting.) And, I'm going to crawl into bed early and hope that I can doze off and make it through the night and wake up refreshed. What would that feel like?! (One can only hope, and plant the seed for sleep success.) I so need that!!

Sweet dreams to you!!

Who You Really Are! By Kelly K. Brown

Standing in the light of the Pantheon, Rome, Italy

I wrote the email (highlighted below) for a dear friend who is going through what most would deem a serious life struggle. Upset people, forceful opinions… everyone strongly set in their ways, their point of view the ONLY right point of view according to them. Condemnation, judgment, and anger are being given free reign in this particular life situation.

At times like this, it is easy to be tempted to be judgmental. (As my friend was telling me the story, it was amazing how quickly I felt it rising in me!) It is easy to forget ‘who we really are’, and want to lash out at others in our ‘expectation’ of how they should behave. It is interesting how when we do that, we find ourselves behaving (even if only mentally) exactly as those we condemn who are themselves throwing judgment all around.

And you feel just miserable when you do that… don’t you?

On my own personal journey, I discovered something wonderful about who I really am and how acting from that knowledge not only makes me feel wonderful, it literally ‘moves mountains’, creates miracles and makes my life ‘EASY!’. When I purposely take control of my thoughts and focus on the true essence of my being, when I find myself coming only from that which we all truly are on the inside… I find I have nothing to give beyond Pure Unconditional Love!

Love for myself and extraordinary love for others. Compassion, understanding and a knowing we are all one fills my heart and mind and any judgment I was holding onto disappears and I again find the way to shine my light so others who are watching might catch a glimpse of what they also forgot--- WHO THEY REALLY ARE!

My daughter, DeeDee and I enjoying the architectural structure and what the light represents to us!

The thing that will boggle your mind most, is when we access our unconditional love and allow it to be our guide, LOVE does all the work! Walls come down, opinions change, and enemies quickly become allies… and it all begins with being Who You Truly Are… A Source of Unconditional Love!

From this perspective, you will find you are no longer waging ‘wars’ against anything---not people, countries, the economy, illnesses—you will find you are living in a state of being ‘FOR’ what you desire most. Things like peace, well being, love, harmony, joy, and prosperity. And best of all… you will have all those things in an abundance you never dreamed possible!

A joyful reminder of Who You Really Are:

YOU ARE:

The Calm in any storm
The Light in a darkened world
The Voice of Reason in calamity
The Joy of Love expressed
The Hope others need to see
The Peace in strife-filled situations
The Harmony of life
You Are Unconditional Love...

All of these… You Are!!!

These items are not only in you... and they aren’t something outside of you to strive for…

Peace, love, light, joy, harmony, well-being... These ARE YOU!

At Your Core, Your Very ‘Being’, You Are All These Things! WE are all these things!

Allow me to share two strategies to keep you on path regardless of any circumstance you may currently be living:

1) Remember Who You Really Are (all those listed above and more!)

2) Listen to the voice of your inner guidance (those inner gems of wisdom we all have) that in moments of stress are often harder to hear. You do that by first and foremost seeking relief for you! Look FIRST for ways that YOU can feel good no matter what the current external situation is that you are facing! This will bring you back into alignment through the wonderful feelings of relief.

That is the most important thing you can do to resolve ANY life issue--- find new perspectives and thoughts that bring relief and then make you (YES YOU!) feel good!!!

Feeling even a little better is a HUGE step in the right direction!

When you feel that relief, and remember Who You Really Are---unconditional love, peace, joy, harmony, and well-being--- all that is YOU will then flow to others perfectly; with great ease, right on cue!

You will influence everyone around you for good with little or no effort (no pushing, no force or anxiety required) ---and you will create incredible miracles in every situation of life in which you are involved.

Who You Really Are? Pure Unconditional Love!

The Power of Positive Friends & Stuff! by Mary

Today was the podcast of our BTS gals, and as usual, it was full of great conversation and excitement for each others’ projects and for all of the amazing miracles that continue to happen in all of our lives. Although Robin is ready for the snow to be over in NY, Leslie was ready to get out and make snow angles once again and is having fun playing in it. Liimu was running her kids to school late because of the snow in Philly, and Kelly was joyful as usual… so all of us had our “thing” that we chatted about today. I was thrilled because I had a big “share” that has taken place over the past week, and it’s very, very cool to think about how awesome the power of intention is coupled with belief, for what you want!

Leslie shared an amazing letter from a very close relative that described the power of synchronicity and how she had been used in this person’s life. They wrote a very eloquent letter that described little hunches they got or messages they kept receiving to follow on a particular path. What an incredible story, and it made us realize, that all of us, if we just followed our heart and our hunches, would get along a lot better and we can do it without all of the worry that seems to develop when we’re unsure of what to do. Each one of us then talked about events in our life and whether or not we should push or NOT push, and ultimately, it all came down to – if you get an idea.. you should really LISTEN to it and follow through if it makes sense, and then when its time to take ACTION, you can’t sit idly by and not take action, you’ve got to do what you have to do.

I shared with the group that I’m using TEXTING to plug into Kelly’s positive energy whenever I need to. Its been very cool because she helps to keep me focused during the day when about 100 things are flying at me from every direction, and I’ve been able to bounce things off of her and get her read on the situation.

Within the past week, I’ve decided to intentionally pray for and visualize and believe for a money miracle, and so I literally just “cast the financial burden away” and let my spirits be lifted by KNOWING, that I would be taken care of. I also realized, in no uncertain terms that I’ve certainly been through many difficult times, financially or otherwise, and that no matter what happened, that I would be fine. That thought alone gave me a lift.

So within the past week, three individuals have been in touch with me to promote them on the lecture circuit.. a profession that I have not been in full time for about 15 years! How bizarre is that? And not only that, they’re very cool and different types of performers. One is a Barak Obama one man show, and one is a Sarah Palin impersonator, who I loved The Black actor has been a long time friend and former client- Darryl Van Leer, and the Sarah impersonator is a new friend, but a soul sister of sorts! We hit it off immediately and I just would love to spend more time with her and hopefully we’ll be working together. The other speaker has material on the way and I’m not sure how to describe him yet. The other thing that happened is that I have a potential new client.. from the UK. This person found me today on the WEB.. so I was pretty psyched about that.

So now I’m facing an uncertain future about WHAT I’ll be doing, only that I will be doing promotion of some kind. I’ve realized that I get a charge out of promotion and my brain becomes overrun with exciting ideas for the programs or products that I’m promoting. I’m not “attached” to the what or the how.. just that there WILL be money flowing in – in new directions.

One of my best friends has offered to treat me to a weekend in New Orleans for Marti Gras, so that’s another “gift”… and I’m just still believing that more is going to continue to filter in. It’s pretty cool to live this way, and to be able to just have the faith that it all will work out.

I was mentioning plugging into Kelly during the day to get her read on the situation. She’s very well versed on the law of attraction and watching it in her life. I’ve definitely seen the results of it in my life, but because I’m not always able to keep my brain in a positive state due to home pressures like getting ready for school and being crunched on time, but recently, by being able to plug into Kelly, I’ve been more able to stay positive when uncertainty or stressful situations hit.

This is also what the BTS gals do for me, and I’m certain, that over time, that these women will be a source of strength for many, many people. I’m happy to be united with this team of strong women, and hope that this message of unity and positive strength can be carried out into the world through us.

I’m feeling powerful today. Not because I’m powerful, but because God created a universe where there are certain laws, that if we abide by them, can work in our lives to create a life that is seamless and effortless. That’s the goal, and that’s what I hope to achieve, by getting, beyond my stuff!

Watch What You Wish For - by Liimu

Last year, when I was juggling several different clients, working 70-80 hours per week, I begged the Universe for some much needed time off. I begged the Universe to give me space in my life so I could breathe, meditate, exercise, nap, relax.

So, here I am - several months later - gifted by the Universe with exactly that. Most people would probably be terrified to be in my situation - an independent consultant with no active projects. I'm THRILLED. The Universe has been so good to me, I can only believe that this current situation is no exception.

Now this doesn't mean I'm sitting around on my couch eating organic bon bons. I'm working on my gospel demo and helping get my wedding band back up and running, I'm working on finishing and starting several writing projects, I'm launching my own coaching business, and I'm kicking off the Spring season of my running group Philadelphia Moms in Motion. And of course, I'm continuing to get together and network with people in my industry in the hopes of shaking some of those apples out of the trees so my family can eat some good ole fashioned American apple pie! But did you notice something all these things have in common? Well, I did. They are all SUPER FUN! I love to sing! I love to write! I love to help people! I love to run!

Life is good when you're in the flow of it. The Universe always seems to serve up if not exactly what I ask for, exactly what I need. And this month, it's a WHOLE lot of free time.

Yay, me! Got what I wished for!

Being a Leader in Difficult Times - by Mary Gardner

This morning I was at the YMCA and admiring some cute work out gear that a couple of the gals were selling. I stopped to talk with them and asked how they got into this work. They told me they were selling the clothes for another gal who imports the line from Israel, Brazil and all over the world. Then I told them that the clothes were so cute, but they just weren’t in the “budget” right now!

Did that strike up a conversation! One of the women started complaining about being on a budget… I think for the first time in her life. Her husband keeps asking her where the money is going and she said, “groceries”. She didn’t have a budget before so she hasn’t curbed her spending.. and it was frustrating to the husband.

At that moment, she and I both said that everyone is having to cut down now.. and that everyone is having to change their habits. It was also a moment that I could have chimed in some inspirational quote, a piece of faith or cast a vision for the future, that isn’t the doom and gloom that the TV personalities are sharing, but a vision of hope, that we will be fine and we will survive the hard work we will put in to get us out of this recession.

So this morning, I’m searching for the perfect quote to memorize and share with those who I come in contact with throughout my days. And here are a few:

"It is time for us all to stand and cheer for the doer, the achiever - the one who recognizes the challenge and does something about it." Vince Lombardi

Tony Dorsett said:To succeed... you need to find something to hold on to, something to motivate you, something to inspire you.

Henry Kaiser said: “Trouble is only opportunity in work clothes.”

Then after I say the quote.. I’ll listen to my own words, and then go put it to action!
This is how we stay a leader, in difficult times!

Dumping Ground Stuff - by Robin Gorman Newman

I'm feeling a bit like a dumping ground this week, and it's both unsettling and empowering.

Unsettling because it felt draining. Empowering because if I can learn how to handle it, I'll cultivate an inner strength that I can put to good use.

Various people in my life shared their thoughts and negative energy with me, without my inviting it (or did I, unconsciously?). Hmmmm....

These are not women I'm particularly close with, but people who reached out to me to for a shoulder to lean on. On one hand, I try to be there for someone, but I find that I walk a fine line between offering support and being dragged down and depleted myself.

It was interesting because a close girlfriend of mine emailed me that she was annoyed at herself. She wanted to take the day off from work because she was sick, but instead made herself go to the office so she could be there for a client in need. You can probably guess what happened. The client didn't show up, and my friend was left kicking herself for not putting her own needs first. She swore she would never do that again.

Why is this so hard to do sometimes? To put ourselves first. And, be true to our inner voice that is screaming...."don't go there!" Is it that as women (not to exclude men) we do so much and feel the need to be there as caretaker for as many people as possible? And, where do you stop? The universe?

No wonder many of us, myself included, are just plain tired. It catches up with you emotionally and physically after continual practice.

So, how to change?

Well, I for one, want to better protect myself. I'm glad to listen to someone but not if they're constantly a taker. I'm not therapist to the world. It's not a role I've chosen to play. Maybe because I'm willing to give someone my ear, I can get taken advantage of. And, that leaves me feeling cold and exposed. I gave of myself, and was it truly appreciated?! I shouldn't be asking that question, should I? If I'm wondering, then why do it?! Right?

I'm going to work on letting people know that they're sharing too much information, or that I'm not in a position to comment...or however I feel I can most delicately handle a situation. No doubt, if they're sharing with me, they're sharing with others too. And, if I'm not in their close circle, then I become a third party objective voice. I understand that this can be beneficial, but not ultimately to me.

What do you do when you find someone is gravitating toward you and looks to you for advice, support, etc. and it's not someone you truly want to have in your life that way?

Whew! That's all a load off my mind....thanks for letting me share with you.

"But How Do You Do That?" By Kelly K. Brown

My youngest daughter, DeeDee with me feeding the birds in Venice, Italy!

He who cannot change the very fabric of his thought will never be able to change reality.
-- Anwar al-Sadat


Recently, one of my dear, witty, funny, creative and well-informed friends sent me and many others an email very upset about the buyouts of pharmaceutical companies by other pharmaceutical companies, international bank cartels and some other recent newsworthy items all filled with angst, concern, worry about our future… indeed the future of our world as we know it. At the end of the email, he asked our opinion on any one or all of these topics.

Chances are you’ve received emails like this, been in similar conversations or saw something on the news that filled you with all these same type of ‘doomsday’ thoughts about those items, real estate, the economy or the latest business in town and how many people they laid off.

If you follow my articles or blogs (or know me in person), you already know that I won’t even for a moment allow my thoughts to go to a place where those thoughts can lead me to feelings that are anything BUT phenomenal for me and those around me. (Our Thoughts do become our reality… so I’m very, very careful about what my thoughts are at all times)

Remembering that YOU are NOT your thoughts… that YOU are the THINKER of your thoughts, is the fundamental truth behind all I’m saying and the quote above. That is the reason you have the natural ability to control what goes through your mind---most of us just forget because we are always so caught up in the emotions our thoughts have already created, its like a roller coaster that just never stops to let us off.

People often ask me quite sincerely, “But How Do You Do That?" How do you stop yourself from obsessing about all that is going on in the world? How do you control your thoughts with so much chaos in the world?”

To help you find a thought process that might work for you, I thought it would be interesting to share an excerpt of my email response to my friend… Enjoy!



Dear Friend:

One of the things about you I love most is your passion and interest in knowing so much about all that is going on in our world, and your willingness to express it!

Having said that, let me share my honest, yet predictable response to your question on these topics.

I think you are likely correct that something is up in all that---and my response will always be somewhat the same regardless of the latest drama going on in the world---no matter what it is.

My response is: be informed, notice what is going on and pay attention! Then, as quickly as possible where ANY unwanted circumstance is, NOW only focus on what you want to see as the perfect outcome. An outcome for the good of all of us!

Focusing, talking and expressing any energy about these situations other than that will only bring more into the world of what you seem to be saying you do not want!

I also, through my own experience, now know beyond any doubt that vibrational thought effort is far superior to physical effort (or fighting what I don't want) ever was or could be.

Unless one just likes the drama of it all...

I am going out on a limb to say I feel fairly certain many will respond to your email and the energy they express will be anger, frustration, worry, even fatalism that this is how the world is, this is where we are going--- all of which are extremely low energies--- and won't create the change we'd all like to see.

For me, I'll take your info and focus on some, Kelly Sunshine kinda thought about how the law of attraction will work this out Perfectly, Soon and with Relative ease!! ---using my ability to focus and vibrate at levels that bring about incredible miracles. I’ll think about how I’d like our world to move forward.

Imagine our world if it was filled with only those kind of thoughts and harmonious vibrations?

The point is this… we have more wars against more things in this world---all with the mistaken belief that fighting AGAINST something will bring about our desired solution… when the truth is: fighting against anything just brings MORE of it, because what we focus on EXPANDS… our thoughts become our reality!

We fight against cancer, the economy, starvation in other countries… we fight against everything. But what if we focused on a cancer cure is coming, the economy can do as it wishes and I will still prosper, mentally ‘seeing and believing’ there is enough food in the world to feed everyone and imagining how we could get it to those in need. Can you ‘feel’ how different just changing your thoughts to those type of ideas really feels inside you?

That is the Law of Attraction in Action my friend… by choosing thoughts that make you feel good, thoughts that are inspired by what you truly want to see in your personal life and the world, thoughts that literally FEEL GOOD.

That’s the answer you’ve been searching for! That’s EXACTLY "how you do it"—by thinking thoughts that feel better and then another thought that feels better… it really is as simple as that! Those are the kinds of thoughts that change the world!

Thinking incredibly good feeling thoughts for YOU!

Kelly